Seduce me with consent

So I want to talk about consent and how sexy it is for me.

This might seem obvious, but I'm old and have been to too many parties in the past where consent wasn't really clear.

There, I kissed the person who kissed me back. Of course, I did. But first, after they had kissed me and hugged me and groped me without asking and I felt like well I just go along with it.

It just felt easier. I think many of you might recognize that feeling when one felt it would be more challenging to say no than just continue down this road and accept.

Not a great thing and it fucked up my view on what I wanted, really wanted for many years when it came to sex and intimacy.
I have tried to do my best for myself over the years to ask for consent but also to be clear if I do not want something.

This weekend I meet so many people and it was wonderful. It´s one of those spaces where I just feel free, safe and myself. I danced, I laughed and I kissed so many people and received so many kisses.  

It hit me somewhere during the second night how ever-present I experience consent to be in that space and how safe it makes me feel.

And most of all, how damn sexy it is.

It's something incredibly sensual and respectful with that small moment when you're just getting close to another person, someone raises an eyebrow or just looking at you a bit more and you give the nod back. Then you kiss and for me, that small moment of consent before the kiss is something that really heightens the experience so much.
It's today one of my top sensual things than that kind of concern. Not just in kissing but for example when I have someone's hand on the side of my chest when we kiss. Then they do that lil tapping with their fingers, just a bit to ask "Can I slide my hand further down and I can nod with the kiss and then I just melt.

I just love that and during this weekend, I realized how far I come from that girl that said yes to things she did not want to. Now I only say yes to what I want, I lean into myself and listen to what I want AND I listen to what others want (The best I can and I hope I succeed).

This weekend, consent was everywhere and with that, I also had those times where they and I knew that we could just drown in each other. Because consent was there before

Well, this is perhaps not the most coercive blog post I've written.But I just want to say that in that little raised eyebrow, in that little nod, in that whispered "Is this OK" or "Can I kiss you"...  is more sensuality than so much more than I've been through during my teenage years and that is worth it's own words.